When Richard Branson's first Virgin Enterprise Rocket spaceflight blasts off, among its precious cargo will be Paris Hilton, Madonna, Tom Hanks, Moby and Victoria Principal, yet not all are taking the trip without fear. Hilton has revealed that she’s “very scared to do it. What if I don't come back?” questioned the star. “With the whole light-years thing, what if I come back 10,000 years later, and everyone I know is dead?” Hilton’s comments have engendered serious consideration from the scientific community.
“Ms. Hilton’s concerns are utterly valid,” stated Dr. Leon Volman of the American Institute of Outer Space. “Based on her astonishing 'whole light-years thing' postulation, our studies indicate the ship could travel into the future through a quantum time warp.
“Thus, the stars would find themselves returning to an Earth devastated by the 500 Year Asteroid Attack of 4,022, a barren planet ruled by a gigantically mutated, 1,000-legged spider king and his army of flying ears that dribble a gelatinous, acid-like bile onto their victims. The celebrities would be forced to turn to cannibalism to survive, Victoria Principal being the first to go as she is old and weak. Hilton and Madonna would very likely battle to the death," continued Volman. "That is unless the advanced strain of leprosy that we expect will exist turns them into screaming heaps of barely living scar tissue. So yes, she should be scared."
“Ms. Hilton’s concerns are utterly valid,” stated Dr. Leon Volman of the American Institute of Outer Space. “Based on her astonishing 'whole light-years thing' postulation, our studies indicate the ship could travel into the future through a quantum time warp.
“Thus, the stars would find themselves returning to an Earth devastated by the 500 Year Asteroid Attack of 4,022, a barren planet ruled by a gigantically mutated, 1,000-legged spider king and his army of flying ears that dribble a gelatinous, acid-like bile onto their victims. The celebrities would be forced to turn to cannibalism to survive, Victoria Principal being the first to go as she is old and weak. Hilton and Madonna would very likely battle to the death," continued Volman. "That is unless the advanced strain of leprosy that we expect will exist turns them into screaming heaps of barely living scar tissue. So yes, she should be scared."
Obtained...from E!Online
